Anything’s possible with coffee and a typewriter.

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If it was meant to be, you can’t screw it up; if you screw it up, that’s the way it was meant to be.

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People refuse to look shit up before reposting on Facebook, but will spend several minutes taking a test to see what sort of potato chip they are.

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There are no canaries in the Canary Islands. Same thing goes for the Virgin Islands. No canaries, either.

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Dream Rocks

The kids played in the open field beyond my fence line. I could hear them yelling and laughing as they used a stick as a bat and small rocks as balls.

Every once in a while I’d catch the sound of stone cracking against wood and the kids whooping it up. I wanted to go watch, but I had leaves to rake.

As they carried on with shouts of joy, it took me back to my childhood, playing baseball in field below our subdivision.  Then a well-hit pebble struck me in the head, knocking me out.

I began to dream.

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I try never to think before I speak. I like to be as surprised as everyone else.

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Carrot juice might be good for the eyes, but whiskey will double your vision.

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